" And when she said that word"sweet" it was in a condescending tone. As we were walking out of therestaurant my aunt surprised me by pointing at a different woman and sheasked me,"Do you like her purse?" I was a bit taken aback that she wasmaking me face up to my ill considered purse statement from earlier.With no other idea of how to handle the uncomfortable situation I wasin, I gave in and said, "Yes, her purse is very nice."Later that night when I went home and I was alone in my bedroom I had toface that my aunt Jessica had humiliated me again. She was alwaysgetting the upper hand over me, always treating me like a sissy or ahomosexual. However, this time it was my fault, I didn't think I hadtalked about that woman's cheap purse on purpose, I didn't think I hadplanned to be humiliated by my aunt even though I fully accepted that Ihad erotic fantasies about that. Somehow that effeminate statement justleft my mouth without me thinking about the consequences. That I wouldaccidentally. Still, it was until prep. school that I accepted a boy in my life. I didn't even noticed back then why was him from any other, but it was because he was really feminine, had really gentle and soft factions and a very slim body... But he was a jerk in the bottom. I'm not going to get in details, but he made me feel really bad about myself in plenty of ways. We broke up in a month, but I had the scars for years. By my twenties, my life was awful. I was a shut down, spending my whole days sleeping, playing videogames and watching cartoons. Not just because that jerk, I was just... felling empty, alone, and out of place.I moved away from my parents when the relationship in my house got kinda awkward. They knew that I was failling in school, tryied to talk and such, but and I dind't wanted to talk about it. I was totally closed in myself and it went worse and worse.I only went for food at night, and I always got horribly nervous when there was more than 3 people at the convenience. I.
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